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June 23rd, 2010 § 23 Comments
This is one of those posts I have been writing in my head for a long time. You know, the kind where you want to say so much because what you have to say means so much in your own world that there has to be a perfect culmination of letters, words and sentences to really capture everything that you’re feeling.
Remember the times I told you things were crazy? That life was stressful and I just couldn’t tell you why? Remember when I was on hiatus and you didn’t have anything new on my end for weeks on end? There was a very good reason for all of that. Rather than dance around the subject, I’m going to let a little something I’ve been carrying around for about eight months do the talking.
Ladies and gentleman, I’m moving to Texas.
I’ll pause for your reaction. Done? OK good. Let’s move on to the question and answer portion of our program.
I’m sure whether or not you know me in real life or you’re a blend or a new reader your initial question might be the biggest and most obvious: “Why?!”
And since no matter how you’ve come to know me or why you read this blog, I’m sure you’ve come to appreciate my no frills approach to life so let me be straight up with you. It’s not because I landed my dream job, or because I have fallen madly in love with a man who’s asked me to come live there with him. It’s not because I’m running away from a terrible past and it’s not because I’m hoping it will bring every happiness to my future. It’s simply because it’s time.
It’s time for my family to be within a few hours of each other. In fact, it’s been 12 years since we’ve been less than an 8-hour drive of one another.
It’s time for me to leave Pittsburgh just as it is. I’ve put in my time, left to grow, and returned to enjoy the person I have become since graduating college. The first time I left, I remember comparing this city to a child’s winter jacket: it served its purpose for the season, but at the end of four years, the sleeves were a bit short and it was tough to button up. I had outgrown Pittsburgh and it was time to leave it behind for someone else who needed it. I’m not sure what the witty comparison would be for my second take on my current location but I do know this: I needed it and it needed me. And “it” could be replaced with the names of several friends, coworkers and acquaintances that I’ve spent time with since moving back.
It’s time for me to pursue my passion. It’s time for me to write. There is so much more to be said on this. For now, I leave it at that.
It’s time to take that leap of faith. It’s time to stop dreaming and scheming and thinking “what if?” It’s time to make my time – this very moment, this exact day, not “next week” or “once things slow down” or “when I get a chance” – truly mine.
It’s time to go home.
There are so many things to be done in these next five weeks. Just physically typing out the time I have left here is a bit daunting. I can’t even wrap my head around leaving the things I love in this place and the people who have made it home for so long. And because it’s late and because I’m not fully realizing the realization of what I am about to embark on I’m going to leave it at that. Some might argue about what “home” really means. I might be one of them. I think to me, home is many places. I could still step foot in the newspaper office in Philadelphia where I had my first job and feel at home. I could still cross the threshold of the place where I slept the first night after being born and feel at home. Ten years down the road, you could blindfold me, throw me on a plane, shove me in a taxi and pull up outside my door in Pittsburgh and I’d know exactly where I was and that it felt like home.
The great thing about my own take on home is that no matter how many places I consider it to be, there’s a reason why each has coveted the title. There will be a many a great things I come to learn about my time here after the last box is unpacked in Austin. And there will be many a great reasons reconfirmed once I’m there. For now, I’m trying to remember I’m not gone yet and there are still a few things to do before I say goodbye to Pittsburgh once more. So, if you’ve got a great must-see or must-do in this great city, please send it my way. And if you live here or you live nearby, expect one heck of a party. It just wouldn’t be right for me to go out without a bang. If you find yourself not falling into either of those categories, well, you know all I could ever ask for is your prayer and support – and I know no matter how far across the country or the world I go, I will always have that.
Musings on Daily Life
June 18th, 2010 § 8 Comments
For your entertainment this Friday, a few snippets of why my life deserves its own camera following in tow.
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Scene: Trader Joe’s, Sunday evening. We’re standing in line, as we’ve just finished up our weekly shopping. I’m moving fare from cart to counter, Carrie is packing. Cashier is doing his thang.
Carrie holds up a box of Barbara’s Puffins (peanut to be exact) gets a perplexed look on her face which she then gives towards me holding up the box.
Me: “What is that look for?”
Carrie: “Puffins?”
Me: “Yeah, I told you I was going to eat them with my yogurt instead of granola, remember? You were standing right there beside me.”
Carrie: “Whatever, I just don’t know if I trust something with a penguin on the box.”
Cashier: “Technically, it’s a puffin.”
Me: “BAHAHAHA Booyah!”
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Scene: Phipps Conservatory, University of Pittsburgh campus. Earlier in the week, Andrew asked me to join him for one of the weekly meetings of Frontrunners, Pittsburgh’s gay running club. Figuring it was going to be a bunch of middle aged men, I complied.
Me: “Blah blah blah..family..college. Oh my parents live in Austin.”
Tall man with legs for days I believe to be born from a Kenyan mother although he swears he is Romanian: “Oh, Austin! I’ve heard nothing but great things about it there! They are supposed to have a great gay community.”
Me: “Well…I…don’t know? I…haven’t really…looked?”
And later running with the same man on the trail.
Me: “Blah blah blah..the girl I run with..blah blah blah..”
Man: “You should bring her! We need more diversity in this group, more women to meet other women!”
Andrew and I exchange a look backed by a huge, “Oh shit” grin.
Andrew and Caitlin simultaneously: “I’m/she’s straight!”
Man: “OH! Well whatever, bring her anyway!”
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And last but not least, a random photo of bleu cheese and pepper quiche with a side of greens from my new favorite spot in Pittsburgh, Paris 66 Bistro. This place is like heaven with Parisian servers and all. LURVE.
I’m off for some quality time with Maryland including mucho family – new baby cousins, squeel! – and to cheer on the wonderful Miss Ashley with the lovely Kat!
I (still) Heart NY
June 17th, 2010 § 8 Comments
I’m so glad you all enjoyed Andrew as much as I do. He’s so much more everything you love in person if you can believe it.
Today I am taking a break from my over-vocalized life and decided to share some pictures with you. I keep talking about this trip to New York City and I never even shared anything. I know! I am such a mean girl. Come take a little escape with me, if only for a few minutes, to the most magical place in the entire world. (At least according to yours truly).
The smile that would stay on this face for four solid days.
Fashion 26, the most gorgeous hotel in all of Chelsea – only a few months old.
Red Velvet Pancakes that inspired Jessica
The best breakfast I have ever had at La Bergamote – a croque monsieur and giant mochacino. I still think about this breakfast almost every day. We went here two of the three mornings including at 7 a.m. before our flight. It was that good.
Bridal details at J. Crew.
The famous front steps of my fictional best friend.
You know I jumped that ‘No trespassing’ sign and got my photo in. We may or may not have gone up the street and saw SJP’s real house. Not 30 minutes later we ran into Matthew Broderick, froze like deer in headlights and he literally ran away.
Pastries in Little Italy.
Chandelier at Serendipity3.
Toe touching in Central Park.
More shameless self portraits.
Don’t think this needs much of a caption..except it was at about 1 a.m. and still poppin’
New York looks good on me, don’t you think?
If there’s anything to be said for my time there, it was that I had several dozen times I literally stopped and felt so blessed. We all kept saying how lucky we felt to have taken a trip and enjoying so many of life’s blessings. I know NYC gets a lot of hype and I know I have never lived there so I have no idea how hard it is to make it, but I know it makes me happier than any other place I ever visited. And with that said, I have officially gone into withdrawal again. *sigh* New York, I love you.
Tough Love
June 14th, 2010 § 15 Comments
How’s it hangin homies?!?! What’s that look for? Your face looks a bit…off. Are you feeling OK? Summer heat got you down and sweaty? What? What did you say? Ooohh…..I get it. You’re wondering where the heck I’ve been!
Well, I don’t really have a concrete answer for you, hence the shrug. (Plus I like shameless promotion of my face so booyah! Two birds, one stone.)
How’s everything going with the Summer Spending Challenge? I sure hope you weren’t expecting me to hold you accountable, because uhh, I have completely been absent from the Interwebs. I am in over a month solid now – I started in NYC remember? – and friends, let me tell you, this whole non-materialistic side of me? She is not always the most fun chickita to spend your days with. Some days I am completely fine. And by “some days” I mean “days I don’t step foot into a mall.”
I didn’t find this out until last week when Carrie asked me to accompany her on a trip to one of the seventy billion malls in Pittsburgh. Always up for a challenge, I agreed, fully knowing this particular mall is one of two in the area that houses The Limited. Now, perhaps it’s because I have such limited access (no pun intended – although haha) to the store, but I just absolutely lose it in that place. I seem to always stumble upon a great deal or six there for tops suitable for work and play and I can’t even begin to give you a list of reasons why you simply must try their dress pants. I’ve squeezed my tuccus into plenty of cotton blends and let me tell you whoever these Drew and Cassidy characters are, they sure seem to know their way around a needle and thread – especially to the tune of a curvaceous frame like mine. Just try ‘em. I dare you not to sashay around your world and get a few compliments thrown your way.
After that mini love letter, you’ve probably figured out how hard it was for me to just hang out in that store. While I’m all good in the bottoms department of my wardrobe, what sensible woman wouldn’t feel some sort of way seeing so many beautiful, light, bright, trendy tops on sale for 30 percent off?!? Surprisingly, I only whined for about five minutes. Then I put on my fashion consultant hat and performed the task at hand of “wear this, not that.” Afterwards, we walked into Gap, another store whose bottoms I’ve been known to swear by. Again, it wasn’t the pants that tempted me, but rather the $10 deal on t-shirts and tanks screaming at me from every rack and table. “Oh the endless possibilities,” I thought. “Just a few colors and my options are endless! I can match so many accessories I already have with these! Oh gosh, WHY?!?!”
Y’all I had to straight up scold myself and walk right out of there.
I looked at Carrie and said, “I can’t take this, I have to go outside.” I swear I could hear my Gap card screaming from my wallet. And I swear I could feel my blood pressure raise by about 30 percent.
After what felt like six hours, – and let’s be honest, it was but a few minutes – Carrie emerged, another bag in tow. She bought me a coffee and told me she was proud of me. That felt pretty good. If you’re going to hop on the Summer Spending Challenge train with me, you better have some supportive friends on board.
At the end of the day, she’s one to count on.
Speaking of support, I’d like you to meet Andrew.
Adorable. And yes, I pushed him around on my cart in the grocery store.
Andrew is a new addition in my circle of friends, and a much-needed one at that. He’s one of those people I connected with instantly on so many levels and in a very short time, it felt as if we’d known each other for a very long time. Don’t you just love that?
Andrew has had a similar history with credit cards so when I told him about the Summer Spending Challenge, he was in. He is the only person in my daily life participating and I believe he needs this challenge and my support just as much I need it and his. We share a love of running, food, men, Nicki Manaj and laughing. Boy oh boy do we laugh. We’ve already got our own little lingo down and can be found in various parts of the city laughing hysterically at seemingly ridiculous things. Also? The man can give a compliment like nobody’s business. While stuffing my face with fried goodness one night he looked at me and said, “You’re so hot.” To which I answered (between bites of powdered sugar dough), “Let’s get married.”
In an effort to do things that don’t involve shoes, handbags, tops and bottoms, we have had some great times. Check out the food action at last week’s Three Rivers Art Festival.
Did you know gyros are my favorite summer food? Well now you do.
Mm. Mhmm. Mm.
Ladies and gentleman, that would be a deep-fried Oreo. It will change your life.
This weekend, we decided to torture ourselves even further and step foot into a mall. To be fair, Andrew’s 21st birthday is next month, so he needs to gather some ideas for his gift of an outfit to ring in the big day. If you’re wondering who is purchasing said gift, the answer would be yours truly. And since it is such a momentous event, of course I will be receiving a gift as well in terms of an outfit purchased by the birthday boy himself. See, there is no rule against purchasing gifts in the Summer Spending Challenge. However, if you’re going to strike up a deal such as this, please do not go overboard. You cannot convince your friends and family that buying toilet paper and toothpaste for them equates six pairs of earrings at H&M for you.
After partaking in poignant conversation over dessert (come to Mama, sweet red velvet cheesecake..and a Bellini? Yes please.) I made a spur of the moment decision to head into a jewelry store. “OK you’re going to help me pick out a ring to tell my pretend boyfriend to buy when he proposes,” I blurted out in hurried breath as we walked in. “And his name’s Scott!” I said in a hushed whisper as we started peering in the bright cases.
As we both looked – for ourselves, naturally – I was a little disappointed I couldn’t find the style I had in mind. Several years ago – and just as single as I am now – I had been on a similar adventure with a friend who had a real significant other that could make such purchases, I snagged a catalog that’s been stuffed in drawers and boxes through my cross-state move boasting pictures of sparkly gems and happy models couples.
However, once someone waited on us, the real fun began. “Let the cases be opened!” my mind sang. Andrew had me trying on everything from three stone arrangements to an $8,000 multi-carat ring (both of which I did not like). We eventually agreed on a style I never thought I’d like and just like that the picture of my “oh it’s so non-traditional” engagement ring catalog was kicked to the curb, literally (Sundays are garbage night).
To be fair, the store was nearly empty and near closing time so I didn’t feel like we were taking up someone else’s time who was going to buy. This gave us an opportunity to not only take our time and enjoy the process, but totally play it up. If you have questions about financing or cleaning policies at a certain nationwide jeweler, we know all about it thanks to my friend’s humor in the situation.
Me: “Oh, just tell him I like them both and I can’t decide. He’ll know which one to choose when he sees them.”
Sales Woman: “Oh but it’s your ring and you wouldn’t really be happy with one you liked less would you?”
*Andrew and I exchange glances and smirks*
Me: “You’re right. Tell him I like this one better.”
In all, it was a great diversion to the daunting thought of, “Ican’tbuyanything!!!” which seems to pop up in our minds constantly. Forget sex every seven seconds. We’re thinking about capris, polos, rompers and sundresses. Ah, Labor Day you seem so close, yet so many weeks away.
So tell me, who’s been sticking with the Summer Spending Challenge? I’ve heard from a few who’ve failed or nearly failed it already! What’s working??
Have you ever tried on rings without so much as a man in your life? Or done something else just for fun with no intention of buying?
