Lacking Nothing
November 24th, 2010 § 16 Comments
Well, I’m sure if you’re taking a glimpse around blogs and web sites this week, you’re going to run into a lot of obligatory thankful posts. I’d like to think that I do a lot of clamoring on in my little spot of the ‘Net on the things that I am thankful for year-round. I’ve always considered myself to be a lucky person. Every day I give so much praise to God as I can for what He’s given me.
That aside, can I talk about the things I’m thankful I didn’t get? You know, the stuff in life I thought would change my life that never happened.
Like all those rejection letters and e-mails from newspapers across the country. The ones that I ripped and clicked open feverishly with anticipation thinking, “Is this the one? Is this it? Oh my gosh, am I going to get an interview?” No.
Or how about the experience I had with my first half marathon? The one where I schlepped through the rain, walked more than I ran, had a mild panic attack and finished with a time I would never admit to out loud. When I was dried off, fed and napped, after the blisters healed and the soreness dissipated, how I wondered, “Will I feel that love for pounding the pavement again? Will I ever get excited to fork over my hard earned dollars and register for a race? Will I thrive on training for 12 weeks a second time around?” No.
There’s been hardships with people in my life; friends whom I once held close to my heart, saw every day, made memories with. “Will our circles collide again? Will we bridge the gap and cherish more time spent together?” No.
And how could I forget the times my I had my heart set on everlasting love? “Is this it? Will this be the one person who changes everything? Will he be the one to support me while I live out my dream of freelancing while raising our kids?” No.
This year, I’ve had to leave behind places and faces I never want to forget. I had to go from the fast-track to a slow stroll. My life sort of felt like a merry-go-round. It was going fast – really fast – because a force greater than my control just kept spinning. When I finally shouted out in protest, “Stop!” the dizzying pace gradually slowed and the blur of beautiful life – green trees, blue skies, clouds – all started to become clear and distinct.
I’m thankful I didn’t stay 25 forever. I’m thankful I didn’t hold myself back from taking a leap of faith when I did. I’m thankful I didn’t end up at the newspaper in Roanoke, Virginia or Glen Burnie, Maryland. I’m thankful I’m not giving up my mornings and Sunday afternoons to my Garmin Forerunner and a constant shuffle of my iPod. I’m thankful I didn’t hire a moving company or rent a moving truck to transport my belongings half way across the country. I’m thankful I didn’t move somewhere I’d be forced to find an apartment and a job right away. I’m thankful I don’t have a 9-to-5 job and that I don’t sit in rush hour traffic. I’m thankful I don’t feel the need to blog about what I eat, how I exercise or even the need to write here every day.
I’m thankful I didn’t get asked out on more dates, or get engaged or married or pregnant. I’m thankful I didn’t have to make any big life decisions without consulting anyone but myself.
I’m thankful I didn’t have to go to any funerals. I’m thankful I didn’t have to grieve.
Most of all, I’m thankful I didn’t realize all the didn’t ‘s and don’t ‘s until I sat down to write this. If you know me, you know I believe in fate and faith and prayer and God. I believe He’s got a super special plan written just for me. Without all those didn’t ‘s and don’t ‘s, the did ‘s and have ‘s and happen ‘s I’ve got behind me and those ahead of me wouldn’t be so wonderful, amazing and exciting to look forward to.
And that’s quite a bit to be thankful for.
Happy Thanksgiving.
What “don’t ‘s” are you thankful for right now in your life?
Handmade Support
November 18th, 2010 § 11 Comments
There are plenty of great posts out there on how to be a great spectator (see here and here) at someone’s race. It’s certainly not something to be taken lightly – I mean, you wake up early, trek down to the race site to stake out a good spot and then post up and wait. As easy as it may seem to complain about all this “responsibility” and “how cold/hot it is” and how you’re “so tired,” let’s get real here – you’re sitting on your keister, sipping coffee watching people work their butts off. It is not your place to do anything but feel inspired and proud.
This was at mile 16 – this girl is seriously amazing. She had just asked me, “So, do you wanna grab some breakfast?”
I’ve been on both sides of the barrier and I can tell you having crowd support is key in a race. Having someone who is there specifically for you makes all the difference in the world. As a spectator, there is nothing more amazing than watching hundreds or even thousands of people push themselves to accomplish a goal. I’m usually the weepy one on the sidelines tearing up at anything – runners with emotional sayings on their shirts, families spotting their athlete and breaking into World Series screams, realizing every Starbucks in New York has a line out the door on marathon morning.
Can you spot her? So inspiring – between 25 and 26.2.
Speaking of the New York City Marathon, it was kind of the center of my trip there a few weeks ago. In case you missed it, let me bring you up to speed. One day, Alex said to me, “So, I’m running the New York Marathon.” And I said, “I’M COMING!” Poor girl didn’t even have a chance.
I wanted to show the greatest amount of support on the smallest budget and in the most convenient of ways (read: get it there in a carry-on bag.) I knew the traditional poster board and markers bit just wasn’t going to cut it.
Since I have been spending a good amount of time at Hobby Lobby lately, I remembered seeing these babies on display with the bolts of fabric. There’s five colors here and I am a terrible crafty lady who can’t remember the dimensions but let me tell you it was more than enough for this project. After purchasing a fabric marker, my bill came in at less than $12. Bargains, folks, I’m all about the bargains.
I returned home to start planning my homemade sign.
My original intent was to create one square per letter to spell out “Happy Go Lucky Alex.” I was going to sew it together with ribbon, like a banner. When I realized I’d need three sets of arms and about three additional feet in height to hold it up, my plans changed. Before that epiphany, though, I cut the squares of cloth down into sixteen (somewhat even) square with my favorite scissors.
Once I laid everything out and discovered the whole need for additional arms and height thing, I reworked my plan.
We’re very technical around here, in case you couldn’t tell.
Again, I laid out and started working. I didn’t want to use felt cut-out letters or all capital letters, so I decided to just go with my own somewhat cursive handwriting.
I made another self-discovery doing this: I do not like to sew. I don’t even want to know how I thought I was going to sew a string of ribbon along the borders of this sign without it looking like a crazed elf who snuck into Santa’s workshop after a little too much eggnog at the holiday party. It also didn’t help that it was the night before I had a 3:30 a.m. wake-up call to catch my flight. I decided to enlist my trust to a slew of safety pins. I ran the ribbon – note: it was a thick, heavy sturdy ribbon, not a silky thin ribbon – both horizontally and vertically across the back to give it as much stability as possible. I couldn’t have my runner looking forward to a limp piece of fabric – it had to stand out amongst the crowds! This was the New York City Marathon, after all. Go big or go home!
This baby packed up nicely into a ziplock bag and definitely stood out. I was more than proud to wave it around and cheer her on and moved beyond words to give her a hug after all was said and done and proclaim, “You’re a marathoner!”
Oh yeah, then we got breakfast.
So, there you have it. I’m sure many of you out there know your way around a Singer sewing machine and could run stitches around me, but what matters in the end is the heart and thought you put behind it. I think this could also work as a great gift for a baby shower, a child’s room or a birthday party. Just don’t wait until midnight to do it. And steer clear of the eggnog – well, at least until you’re done.
My New York State of Mind
November 15th, 2010 § 16 Comments
It’s been awhile since I’ve had anything deeply meaningful to say. I knew New York would change that. It’s amazing how a city, a place, a location, can change the way someone looks at life.
The whole time we were there I just kept telling myself, remember everything about this moment.
I made a physical effort to take it all in. I wanted to recall how I felt and what I saw. I wanted to remember smells and sights right down to their acute details. I wanted to hear snippets of conversation of passersby and be able to share them. I wanted to gather up each emotion my senses went through, bottle it and keep it in a jar for another day, put it on a shelf to look at longingly, paint it in a picture to hang in every space I ever live in. Remember. All I wanted was to remember.
In a sense, I wanted to be a journalist again. That’s what a good one does – paints the picture for their reader so vividly that it’s impossible not to imagine themselves there. When I feel like a journalist, I feel alive. I feel like all of life’s puzzle pieces start forming recognizable borders and the image starts to become so clear I don’t need to reference the box anymore.
It took me several days to unpack my bags. My mind was too busy unpacking every detail of that incredible trip that sparked so much within me.
I’ve been battling the age-old question of “Why?” I’ve been sitting in a room, curtains drawn, being extremely introverted. Thinking far too long and much too deep. New York parted the dark heavy shades, threw back the fabric, casting blinding light through, piercing my eyes. It was only with that ray of brightness that I could see all the dust that’s been floating around my world; the little particles of matter that really don’t make up much and are only cast off a larger material that doesn’t need them anymore.
There are so many parts of our lives we don’t need anymore. That are cast off as dust, but remembered and recalled too often. In the dark, they can’t be seen. Shine a light and you’ve got it all, staring you back in the face, floating silently but seen so clearly.
See, this whole pick up and move across the country thing? It ain’t easy. But do you know what is easy? Thinking about all the things I used to do, all the people I miss whole-heartedly, focusing on what my past had and what my present does not. It’s easy to cast a warm glow on the past because it already happened. You lived through it, you survived, you learned your lessons. The present and the future? You might as well put them in a corner of a dark, cold cement room because you have no idea if you’re gonna love it or hate it.
That’s what I kept doing with my here and now. I kept comparing them to my then and when.
New York was my therapist. My Dr. Phil, if you will. It grabbed me by the shoulders, looked me straight in the eye and said with a Southern drawl, “What are you doo-in’ girl??”
Despite its abrasive nature, New York gave me four days to just work through everything. Work through my doubt, my insecurities, my fears, my questions. It let me be my clumsy self. It allowed me to browse its stores, admire its windows, enjoy its people. It enveloped me in a rush of warmth each time I entered a coffee shop, teeth chattering with cold. It gave me guidance to know exactly where to find a front row spot (twice!) to cheer on my runner at the marathon. It let me stare off into the distance, open my mind and just let the universe come rushing in. It gave me the time to wander its streets and neighborhoods with someone who just gets me, who encourages and supports me in an unbelievable way from a country away. Someone who looked at me many times and said, “You’re so quiet. I can tell you’re inspired.”
She also said, “I can’t wait for you to live here.”
You can’t pay me a bigger compliment.
So for all of that and so much more, I want to say thank you to my beloved New York. Thank you for getting me up out of my chair in that isolated, dark room when you threw back the curtains, turning me around to remember there’s a way out. I know how the old saying goes and I’m not really sure who closed the door this time around, but I peeked my head out and saw a hallway full of many, many more to be opened.
My Happy (Go Lucky) Place
November 5th, 2010 § 11 Comments
Today is a great day.
It’s a dance in your kitchen kind of day.
It’s NYC Day.
The first time I went was four years ago. I fell in love. Hard. I explored the city in the rain atop a tour bus in a poncho. I was the only one who didn’t clamor down to the first level when it started to drizzle, then pour. I was in New York. I was happy. No, I was elated. If someone could have taken a picture of my face as we rounded the corner into Times Square that first night, the shot would have been worthy of a magazine.
I waited three and half years to go back again. This time, more exploring happened. There was no rain, but there was Matthew Broderick. Also, there were self portraits in the bathroom at Serendipity.
I was in withdrawal for two weeks. From New York, not Serendipity.
This time around, the third time, I know I’ll still be in love. I know it will be just as lovely. You see, I’m sharing it with someone very special.
I’m sure you remember this gorgeous face (how could you forget it)? That would be Miss Alex aka Happy Go Lucky.
Just a few months ago she took the adventure with me half way across the US.
We spent an incredibly long time together making that road trip. Coffee was consumed, similarities found, dreams and hopes and “somedays” floated us through 1500 miles of conversation like mile markers. Once we arrived at my new destination, Alex did everything she could and so much more than I ever could have expected to make me feel at home. We parted ways with a lingering goodbye and wet cheeks.
You know how sometimes you just know when you’ve found someone special? When your life’s circle bumps up and overlaps with someone else’s just a little bit and life is never the same? That’s my friendship with Alex.
This weekend, she’s running the ING New York City Marathon. After enduring me and my life change for a week this summer, I figured I owed it to her. Karma is real, my friends, and I believe in acknowledging it, I’m helping myself be the best version of myself. Plus, there’s really nothing I wouldn’t do for my closest friends.
Oh, and if you’re at the airport this morning and you suddenly hear an outburst of joy and laughter coming from down the terminal, don’t worry, that’s just the obligatory greeting for two like souls after they’ve landed – one minute apart – and reunited.
I’ll see you in New York minute.
Better to Give Than to Receive
November 3rd, 2010 § 14 Comments
Now that Halloween is behind us, it’s only a matter of days before the familiar melodies of Christmas carols start greeting you at the doors of your favorite stores. Actually, I take that back. I saw twinkle lights and wrapping paper at Costco two weeks ago.
I love giving gifts. For me, Christmas is usually reserved for family. Birthdays are when I make a bigger deal for my friends. I use them as an opportunity to really let my creative juices flow. Fall is a busy one when it comes to the celebration of my second family and since I’ve got a lot more time on my hands, I’ve been documenting my craftiness over the last few weeks. I figure if you’re anything like me, you like putting a little personality under the bow, and if you’re really like me, you’d rather make the bow yourself, and while you’re at it, the wrapping paper, too. So without further ado, let’s get down with our crafty selves!
The first thing I do is decide on a theme. Sometimes I’ll use the recipient’s pending age, other times I’ll theme around an interest of theirs or even a popular phrase or saying. Many times I’ll hone in on something that’s uniquely “us.” For example, I once themed Carrie’s birthday, “Carrie And Caitlin’s Infinite Playlist” – inspired by Nick And Norah’s Infinite Playlist. The tag for each gift looked like an iPod and on the screen was a song thats lyrics directly pertained to what the gift was and each song had some sort of history with one or both of us. I gave her a first aid kit for her car with a line from Danity Kane’s Damaged - “Do, do you got a first aid kit handy/Do, do you know how to patch up a wound?” I used to call her from Philly every time I heard that song on the radio and sing it, so it became a running joke with us.
This year, I decided to play up her age with a little rhyming.
28 and It’s Never Too Late
The gifts
The only thing I knew for sure was that I wanted to get Carrie a book. As someone who loved Eat Pray Love, I wanted to share its message with her. Admittedly, Carrie’s not a big reader. So when she transferred to a different office that had her in the car for about 90 minutes a day, I knew the best solution was to get her an audio book. I’m a member of Borders rewards so you know homegirl was slappin’ down the coupons for this purchase.
The week before her birthday, Carrie came to visit me and we both made our first – and certainly not even close to last – trip to Anthropologie. Was it the $128 silk tops that we petted and drooled over? No. It was the door knobs and coffee mugs. She pointed out several things she liked and I brewed over my decision until the very last possible minute.
Although she walked around the store longingly clutching a set of lovebird tea towels, I decided against spending $42 on stitchery and instead got her two beautiful cups.
When we lived together, graceful Caitlin had a little accident in the kitchen claiming one victim – Carrie’s favorite coffee mug. It’s impossible to find anywhere but online and when I saw these they seemed like a fair replacement (for now, Care, I promise to get your beloved yellow mug back in your hands.) She loves simplicity and the color white and shabby chic decor. I think these pretty much encompass all that, don’t you?
The third element in her gift was something else she pointed out with pleading eyes.
I don’t know anything about this except for the simple fact that it smelled good. I like it when things do what they’re supposed to.
The tags
If I had a trademark for my themed gifts, it would be the tags. It’s my goal to intricate them into the theme as much as possible. Seeing that I chose time, I figured what better way than with a clock? There was no doing this with my own two hands so I called upon my BFF.
Once I pulled an image I liked – from a free site, law abiding citizen FTW! – I took my work into iPhoto.
A little antique effect, some edge blur and retouch. Shazam!
Now, transport to Pages. Zing! Let’s pick a font, shall we?
Perfect. And because I have the need to be anal about consistency, duplicate!
Putting It Together
When I get a good theme working in my head, getting the text down for the tags is a cinch. The thing to keep in mind here is make sure they all connect. You don’t want your theme to be “What’s Cookin’?'” and throw a bracelet in there. Unless it’s a charm bracelet with fried eggs and toast, that just doesn’t go. But if you’re looking for that sort of gift, Etsy is probably a shoo-in (and 100 bonus points if you find it and tell me.)
Once I had the tags done and printed, I had to find accompanying elements to their design.
And the proper tools.
Then it was time for more duplication. Craft time is not unlike hanging out with the Duggar family.
Wrapping this gift wasn’t reminiscent of how I’d normally complete the packaging. Typically, I pick a paper or colored tissue paper and wrap everything in that. Say it with me, “coordination is key.”
While visiting, Carrie left behind a t-shirt. I decided to wrap the candle in that. Being that it was a bulky tin, I figured the shirt could provide some extra cushion in the box I was sending.
Since she so subtly pointed this gift out, I played into her hint dropping with the tag’s text.
Next up were the two cups. I was given a box at Anthropologie and stuffed it with tissue paper and packing peanuts.
I really love this ribbon.
Which is probably why I ran out of it before I could finish with the packaging. I decided to fall back on a classic to wrap the audio book.
I pulled my best Tetris moves and packed up the box, sealing it all in with a layer of bubble wrap. Since I believe first impressions are important, I took the fourth tag and placed it on top to showcase the theme.
Then I sent it off into the dark unknown. Just kidding, that’s the Internet.
As wonderful as it feels to develop a concept and carry out a theme, the real pleasure is in hearing the recipient’s reaction. Or in as is the case with modern technology, in being able to see it from 1,300 miles away.
I think I done good.
Do you like to give themed gifts? How do you make your gifts special?
Your opinion counts! Are you changing your gift giving this year?
